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How Interdependence Promotes Confidence

By Tiffiny J. Fambro | Uncategorized

Feb 16

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In my last blog post, I discussed the concept of codependence. Just to summarize, codependence is when you lose your identity in another person. You are no longer able to distinguish your emotions from their emotions; you focus all your time and energy on taking care of that other person, and you are willing to self-sacrifice a lot to be in the relationship.

Codependency can lead to depression, anxiety, and is an overall unhealthy attachment to another person. However, there is a better way toward living a confident, healthy, happy lifestyle while being in a relationship. It’s called interdependence!

What Is Interdependence?

Interdependence is when you can be in a relationship with another person and still keep your identity intact. In an interdependent relationship, you can openly express your needs, your thoughts, your ideas, your values, and your beliefs without any type of negative repercussions.

These relationships promote feelings of value, worthiness, and a celebration of each other’s differences.  People in this type of relationship still depend on each other for love, affection, and caring, but not to the point where one person feels completely depleted or abused. There is a sense of balance, understanding, individual self-control, and individual self-awareness present.

Here are some signs of a healthy interdependent personality type:

  • You have cultivated deep self-awareness by understanding who you are, what you like, what you want, and taking action toward your life goals
  • You have healthy boundaries and openly implement them with other people
  • You prioritize your needs and don’t feel guilty for putting yourself first
  • You love yourself, validate yourself and acknowledge your self-worth
  • You display clear communication with others
  • You know how to regulate your emotions and take responsibility for your own behavior
  • You have a healthy self-esteem
  • You are okay with people having different opinions and beliefs
  • You have a life that you enjoy outside of your relationships
  • You don’t allow someone in your life that does not respect you
Interdependent couple kissing

Why Interdependence Is Good

When you have an interdependent personality, and you display interdependent behavior, you usually attract people in your life that are authentic, respectful, and value you as a person. Many times, these are the types of people that:

  • Value open and honest communication
  • Recognize that being together is a choice, not an obligation
  • Value confidence and healthy self-esteem
  • Are comfortable with you having your own hobbies and encourages you to have self-care time
  • Enjoy when you spend time together and doesn’t get jealous or worried when you are apart
  • Listens to you, respects your boundaries, and recognizes your value and worth
  • Allows you to feel safe to be vulnerable
  • Are self-sufficient and thankful when you do kind things for them but don’t make you feel like you are obligated to take care of them
  • Provide an emotional space of safety, comfort, respect, warmth, and kindness

Conclusion

The best thing about having an interdependent personality and living an interdependent lifestyle is that you understand how to enjoy your own company. You have mastered the skill of loving yourself, replenishing your energy, and knowing your value and self-worth outside of your relationships.

Being interdependent doesn’t mean you have to constantly be alone, but it does mean that you are comfortable when you are alone with yourself. It allows you to connect with people in a healthy, non-toxic, and non-addictive way.

If this is something you want to learn more about, jump on my calendar for a free call. As a life coach, I focus on helping divorced women get clear on what they want, figure out what is holding them back, and create a strategy to get them moving toward their new life goals.

About the Author

Tiffiny has a B.A. in Psychology, and master’s degree in Public Health Education. She worked in consulting for over 16 years, as well as previously owning a fitness and health business. In her personal life, she used personal development, mindset and health strategies to go from being overworked in a demanding corporate career, emotionally drained in a toxic marriage, physically unhealthy, and depressed to becoming an award-winning figure level bodybuilding athlete and entrepreneur. As a women’s empowerment coach, she works to help women get clear on their goals, build confidence, increase self-esteem, take action on their deep desires and create a life they love

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