By Tiffiny J. Fambro | Confidence

Aug 10

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It saddens me sometimes when I think about the things I did in my romantic relationships when I was in my 20’s. 

I would meet a guy who seemed “nice”. We’d go out on a couple of dates, I’d meet some of his friends, we share a few movie nights and cuddle. 

Then the drama would start!  I would start texting him when I didn’t hear from him; I would call and beg him to come over or for us to plan our weekend together; I’d start overthinking and would worry that he had lost interest in me so instead of voicing my opinion I’d just comply with whatever he wanted; I start judging myself thinking that I was not good enough for him, and the list goes on.

What I didn’t realize was that I was slowing killing my relationship because I was displaying the traits that repel men.  Yes, the traits that make men run instead of wanting to be closer to a woman that they care about.  Those traits were….


  1. Neediness:  Every human has basic needs and desires, however in this context, I’m referring to negative, dysfunctional neediness.  This is the constant, extreme needing of approval, validation, attention, and dependence on your partner.  There is nothing wrong with wanting to spend time with your significant other, but it’s important to create an interdependence.  Interdependence is about being self-aware and acknowledging that you and that person have lives and interests outside of the relationship.  In other words, you enjoy being together, but your life does not end or suffer if you are apart.
  2. Indecision: This is the idea that you literally are not able to make decisions and rely on the other person to always make them for you.  For example, if he asks you what you want to eat, and you say “I don’t know”; or if he asks you, what movie you want to watch and you say, “I don’t know”.  This constant iteration of, “I don’t know” makes you sound childlike and not confident.  The truth is if this were a life or death situation, you would KNOW.  So be an adult woman and make a decision. This shows him that you are a confident woman who knows exactly what she wants and knows how to explain her thoughts to him so that he can deliver.  Tip: Men like to give, but in order to give, they have to know what you want.  If you keep him guessing all the time, it’s going to get old – quick!
  3. Self-Deprecation: ahh my favorite!  This is when you constantly criticize yourself and tear yourself down in front of him.  This screams LOW SELF ESTEEM and no quality; confident man wants to be with a woman who does not fully love herself.  When you have healthy self-esteem, it shows, and men can pick up on the energy of a confident, happy, self-loving woman.  So be thankful for yourself, love every inch of your body, be thankful for compliments, and treat yourself like a 1st place prize instead of the consolation token.

These are the traits that will keep you single or just slowly cripple your relationship.  The interesting thing is, they are all connected to confidence.  When you are able to build up confidence in your life, you create an atmosphere of awareness, clarity, self-love, self-respect, and high self-esteem.

If you are wanting to have dynamic relationships by building your confidence just like I did, then you are in for a treat.  I have taken all of my strategies and put them into my new online course, “The 5 Keys to Magnetizing Confidence”.  This course is self-paced and gives step-by-step guidance to help you start creating a roadmap for living your best life.

Get more details about this course by clicking here and take advantage of the early bird special:  https://cccwomensempowerment.com/5-keys-to-magnetizing-confidence/

Become the woman, a high quality, self-aware, confident, intelligent, loving, generous man would want to date!

XOXO Tiffiny

About the Author

Tiffiny has a B.A. in Psychology, and master’s degree in Public Health Education. She worked in consulting for over 16 years, as well as previously owning a fitness and health business. In her personal life, she used personal development, mindset and health strategies to go from being overworked in a demanding corporate career, emotionally drained in a toxic marriage, physically unhealthy, and depressed to becoming an award-winning figure level bodybuilding athlete and entrepreneur. As a women’s empowerment coach, she works to help women get clear on their goals, build confidence, increase self-esteem, take action on their deep desires and create a life they love

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