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Recently, I had a conversation with a woman who was telling me that she was facing some serious life challenges. Aside from health issues, low confidence, and low self-esteem, she was also dealing with a difficult marriage.
She said that she felt her spouse was not showing her the level of affection that she wanted. She explained that she worked two jobs just to take care of both of them. She pays all the bills and does everything to make sure they have a good life.
Along with this, she said she was always the one telling him that she loved him- she’s always the one showing him affection but never receives it in return. I asked her what she wanted, and she said she just wants to create a relationship and connect with him again.
As we talked, it became clear to me that he is the source of her happiness. I was able to relate to the situation, as there was a time when I thought if I worked hard enough in my own previous relationships, the person would change, and then I would be happy.
I knew this woman didn’t want to hear what I had learned from my experience, but I had to tell her the truth: No person, place, or thing can truly make us happy. Happiness is an inside job, and we as women must take ownership of our happiness.
Here are some ways you can begin taking ownership of your own happiness.
You must become aware that no one else can make you happy. You must realize that no matter where you go, the common denominator is you. Yes, a person’s behavior can be undesirable, but you should not use their bad behavior as an excuse to be unhappy in your own life.
You must recognize your power to create your happiness. It’s all about choosing to not allow anyone to disturb your peace and making sure that you do things that bring you joy- no matter the circumstance. You can incorporate simple daily changes in your life to create happiness.
If you are wanting some ideas on how to get happy, download my free infographic, 5 Simple Ways to Be Happy, in my Free Resources & Give Away Vault. This is a fun, easy way to learn how to create happiness in your life.
Once you understand that your happiness does not depend on the behavior of other people, get prepared to possibly lose relationships. When you live deep inside your joy, your behavior changes, and you start to take care of your needs. When this happens, the people that were demanding your energy and attention either leave or fade out of your life. They recognize that they are no longer the center of your attention and either will leave willingly or will try to force you to go back to your old self. Stand your ground, stay focused on your joy, and don’t give in to their toxicity.
When you own your happiness, you can have everything you desire. Happiness attracts a higher quality of life, good people, abundance, and true love. Once you take responsibility for what brings you joy, you take the burden off of other people in your life.
This is what I explained to the lady I was talking to. I knew it was not the answer that she wanted to hear, but it was the answer she needed to hear. Most importantly, she needed to know that she had the power to change her life and be happy, even if her husband’s behavior did not change.
When a woman can take control of her happiness despite her environment and outside circumstances, she has reached a profound level of freedom that is life-changing. Stop letting someone control your happiness and begin taking ownership of your happiness today!
Ready to start the process of gaining more clarity, confidence, and courage? I have created 3 simple steps to help you on your journey.
Don’t let more time pass by, reclaim your life today!
Tiffiny has a B.A. in Psychology, and master’s degree in Public Health Education. She worked in consulting for over 16 years, as well as previously owning a fitness and health business. In her personal life, she used personal development, mindset and health strategies to go from being overworked in a demanding corporate career, emotionally drained in a toxic marriage, physically unhealthy, and depressed to becoming an award-winning figure level bodybuilding athlete and entrepreneur. As a women’s empowerment coach, she works to help women get clear on their goals, build confidence, increase self-esteem, take action on their deep desires and create a life they love